Reuters is reporting on some interesting new scientific research that suggests many digestive illnesses could be diagnosed by analyzing the gasses emitted in flatulence. I kid you not, the article is Flatulence test sniffs out gut bugs, and it suggests what must surely be one of the most unpleasant jobs on the planet: flatus researcher.
Which leads to our word of the day, flatus: “UK scientists say a hi-tech test focused on flatus — the pungent gas emanating from stool — is highly effective in quickly identifying tough-to-spot viral or bacterial infections of the gut.” There are definitely days I’m glad to be a writer and teacher!
You mean there are actually professional flatulence testers? Imagine having to explain that one at your high school reunion.
Art – “So what do you do for a living Bob?”
Bob – “Well Art, I am an accountant for a large
law firm in downtown Los Angeles. How
about you?”
Art – “Well Bob, I am a professional flatulence
tester. I stick my nose up to strangers
butts until they rip one in my face! would
you like a free examination?”
Bob – “Sure, why not! (Art follows Bob into the
bathroom. As Bob pulls down his pants and
bends over, Art gets on his knees and
positions his nose up to Bob’s anus.)
Bob – “Ready Art?”
Art – “Ready Bob, let ‘er rip!”
Bob – FAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!
Art – (Art takes in the well dispersed
flatulence like a fine wine and
provides Bob with the good news that
everything smells great and also
provides a complimentary reach around.
Alls well that ends well.
Teehee
Well, um, that’s not exactly the way I envision it, but, yeah, you gotta wonder…. 😉